Once You Enter You Can Never Leave.

kristenmastora7:

gallium-knight:

Here’s a test:

I’m holding a baby in one hand and a petri dish holding a fetus in the other.

I’m going to drop one. You chose which.

If you really truly believe a fetus is the same thing as a baby, it should be impossible for you to decide. You should have to flip a coin, that’s how impossible the decision should be.

Shot in the dark, you saved the baby.

Because you’re aware there’s a difference.

Now admit it

woah.

best-of-funny:

princekind:

wow it SURE WOULD SUCK if someone started MAKING OUT WITH ME (it’s reverse psychology) (come make out with me)

X

best-of-funny:

drfrederickchilton:

If gay people don’t use the phrase “I cant think straight around you” as a pick up line. I feel like we have missed a genuinely great opportunity.

X

best-of-funny:

squidvincible:

muelin:

squidvincible:

muelin:

WHATEVER YOU DO IN LIFE

DO IT FOR AMERICA

DO IT FOR PAPRIKAS.

AMERICA

PAPRIKAS.

X

beyoncebeytwice:

magicconchshell:

wikihow is the most useless website ive ever seen in my life

nointerrruption:

having to watch your friends be friends with people you hate

dongstrider:

im—really—weird:

psyducked:

I wish there were necklaces given to us at birth that were half of a unique shape and your soulmate wore the other half and they got warmer the closer together you were and colder the further away you were so you could go on this journey when you’re ready to find your other half so that you could be spared all the pain and heartbreak of being played with by those who don’t take dating as seriously as you do

somebody please write a book on this

icantdotheonesteptwostep:

shouldertappingghosts:

haiirflip:

today a guy confirmed that at boy sleepovers they do in fact talk about girls and who they like a good majority of the time i just thought this would be useful information

Why does this have so many notes? What did you think we do at sleepovers? Meth? Animal sacrifice?

Well thats what girls do

lordkorra:

psychiatrist-cannibal by day

pop-star singing sensation by night

hannibal montanibal 

demigodsavatards-go:

and-then-i-became-suicidal:

igetweakthatsmyproblem:

am-i-perfect—yet:

squeekz4all:

rox1108:

007-reporting:

angelsontheearth:

17851

That’s disgusting.

Well done society.

Well done.

20,299.

148,628

173,490

212,642

279,136 .. this shouldn’t have so many notes. :((

283,151

and actually, I’m glad this has so many notes. Not because people are getting bullied, but because those people aren’t keeping it a secret.

thenaebyrd777:

inhalers:

tips for flirting: carve your number into a potato and roll it towards eligible females you wish to court with

the fact that this would work on me has me concerned

weirdmilk:

dysphorism:

paleslut:

paleslut:

that one day when you think your period is over so you dont wear a pad or a tampon

THIS IS NOT THE POST I WANT TO BE REMEMBERED FOR

BUT HOW ACCURATE IS THIS

GODDAMN THIS IS SPOT ON

poutyowl:

i am perfectly fine with having other people sit on my lap but i can’t sit on other people’s laps because i’m always paranoid that i’d crush them and they’d diE

virska:

shaggy2pope:

most people dont appreciate the amount of followers they have until they imagine that number standing in a crowd staring at them on a stage and knowing that anything you do or dont say could make more come or make them go

so if you think 100 followers isnt a lot then youre not thinking hard enough

I can start a fucking revolution

humorcat:

darrynek:

the nominees are

• leonardo dicaprio
• leonardo dicaprio
• leonardo dicaprio
• leonardo dicaprio
• leonardo dicaprio

and the winner is *opens envelope*

• adele

I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited

vvierd:

i would like to thank tumblr for teaching me how to spell anonymous

phenomenallyextraordinary123:

lindsaylohoean:

2014 is in less than 6 months just let that sink in 

whatsacanada:

What if you woke up one morning to your worst selfie painted on your ceiling

oliviatheelf:

failureuponfailure:

mayhemandprops:

I’m going to warped on saturday and if you reblog this i’ll write your url down and throw it at the crowd, leave it in a porta potty or just give it to someone, maybe a band member idk

LIKES DON’T COUNT

ENDS ON FRIDAY

GOGOGO!

THIS IS REALLY FUCKING COOL

I hope whoever finds mine messages me and tells me that they found me from it.

Reblog if your boobs glow in the dark. 

petparent:

madturbating:

cory in the blouse

utmostidiocy:

A baby’s laughter is one of the most beautiful sounds you will ever hear. Unless it’s 3am. And you’re home alone. And you don’t have a baby.